This Valentine’s Day you and your beau are probably going to watch romantic movies and eat chocolates. Or, maybe exchange gifts, cook some lobster and listen to Sade. Actually, listening to Sade is non-negotiable; add that to your list right now. He will be great and you’ll be stuffed. After all, Valentine’s Day is all about love. But what does that even mean though? And how do you know if, like, the guy you are dating is the one? I won’t pretend to know that answer, but here are a few things that might help you hash it all out. In the end, you can’t cuddle with chocolates; they’ll melt. Trust me, I know from experience.
He makes plans with you. Making plans requires thoughtfulness. If he wants to spend time with you, he will make plans at least once in a while. I get that some guys just don’t make plans. They are spontaneous. Blah blah blah. If homeboy can make plans to hang out with his friends, a nice date night with you isn’t asking for much.
He forgives you. Maybe not right away, but quickly. And he won’t hold your past against you. Forgiveness is a hard thing, so if he is willing to forgive you, he thinks the relationship is worth it.
He lets you be angry, and he hears you out. You shouldn’t live in anger, but if he makes you feel childish or petty for being upset about something that bothers you, he is not allowing you to express what makes you unhappy and why. He listens when you talk not to counter each argument, but to understand you and what makes you feel the way you do.
He is vulnerable with you. He tells you things that make him less superman and more guy next door. He isn’t afraid or too tough to be open and honest about his flaws, shortcomings, and insecurities.
He seeks to live a life that is pleasing to Christ. Yo, if Christ is the center of your life you can’t miss this. You know he isn’t just talking about it either. He is for real. Oh, and if he speaks your Love Language… girl you betta.
He takes advice from you. He knows that you are good at things. He peeped game and saw that you were killing it. He is totally cool with learning from you.
He respects you. He doesn’t talk bad about you to his friends. In fact, homeboy often brags about how great you are. He protects your reputation, and he doesn’t allow other people to attack your character.
He admits his shortcomings and doesn’t make excuses. A lot of men can do the first, but not the second. A good man will tell you when he is wrong and ask for forgiveness.
He makes sacrifices. I can’t stress this enough. If the man ain’t willing to make some sacrifices, he is NOT the one. Love is all cotton candy and sacrifices. Sweetness and selflessness.
He pushes you. He believes the good things about you and wants the best for you. He sees how great you are and wants you to be even better. So he encourages you to keep moving forward. Keep going.
He often tells you how amazing you are, how much you mean to him, and how blessed he is by you, unprompted. Okay, for real though, every single time M does this I am caught off guard. Looking B-U-S-T-E-D. M next time catch me when my face is made up and my hair is done.